Damn it it’s here!

Yep well we’ve gone and done it haven’t we…I say ‘we’ because ‘we’ all welcomed in the new year in some form or another. Now I am already three quarters through the first day of next year. (Question when does it stop being next year and become this year?) Just to be up front I am not all that impressed that next year is here and I am already living it. I was quite happy to wait a little longer for it to arrive – yes I begrudgingly welcomed it in (ask my wife I was a little grumpy about the whole thing) it’s not like I really had a choice right? And quite frankly I am not ready for it!! It’s not that there are things I’ve left undone in 2012 (although I still haven’t unpacked the garage) it’s just that I am not ready for it, I don’t feel optimistic about it, I haven’t got myself into that positive space where I can welcome in the new knowing full well that there is nothing new about welcoming the New Year. Next year is full of the same old same old of last year and that was hard enough to deal with so how am I supposed to get over that while being faced with a whole new year of it ahead of me?????

Yes embrace change, embrace the unknown, create your future, one door closes and another one opens, something will come up it always does (especially if you wait %*#*ing long enough) see the possible in every moment etcetera etcetera. Well yes the door of 2012 certainly closed and the door of 2013 certainly opened (so I guess that bit is true) only I can see no discernible difference in the two and now I am not sure if I am going forward or backward but feel as if I am doing both i.e. I am going backwards into the future.

Oh well I guess I just have to suck it up – I have stepped off the precipice of 2012 and am now free falling into 2013 – I would be lying if I told you I am not worried about the landing, I am. I don’t want more of the same – I want new, exciting, more fulfilling, more prosperity – I WANT IT TO BE A BETTER YEAR THAN THE ONE JUST GONE.

There were significant and wonderful changes in my family’s life last year starting around June and which are still in play. Maybe that has rocked my boat more than I realise – although I do realise the import of the changes and the deep affect they have had on all of us – things are no longer the same and thus, perhaps the crux of the matter, I do not want 2013 to be the same like 2012 was and indeed 2011.

Time for more change then?! Bring it on….I may not be ready (just yet) 2013 but I am willing and I am able!

I may go finish unpacking the garage – better sort the past out so I can step into the future without baggage!

19 Responses to “Damn it it’s here!”

  1. Evelyn says:

    Would a Glühbier (mulled spiced warm beer) recipe make you feel better? I tried it at the Christmas Market in Bamberg, but haven’t made it myself, but here is a recipe (from: http://www.firstbreeze.com/TI-Privatordner/Blogs/Koch-Banausen/2009/gluehbier/) my translation:

    ingredients for 4 liters of Glühbier:

    2 Sixpacks dark beer (= 12 bottles á 0,33 l)
    500 ml cherry juice
    40 ml dark rum
    10 ml lemon juice (~1/2 Zitrone)
    100 g brown sugar
    10 whole cloves
    4 all spice (berries?)
    2 star anis
    1 vanilla bean
    1 tsp. cinnamon


    Cut the lemon into half and squeeze the juice of one half. Set the other half aside.

    Slice open the vanilla bean and scrape out the inside. Keep the bean.

    Grind the cloves and all spice finely.

    Choose a pot that can hold at least 5 liters of liquid. Slowly poor the beer into the pot and warm slowly. Keep the beer at approx. 60C.

    Do not stir the beer, as it will foam too much.

    Keep the beer at this temperature for a few minutes until the foam disappeared. Then add the brown sugar and carefully begin to stir. If you prefer a sweeter “Glühbier” add more sugar or honey.

    Once the foam has completely disappeared, add the finely ground spices, the scrapped vanilla bean and cinammon. Also add the actual vanilla bean and the two star anis.

    You can now increase the temperature to approximately 70C (if you want, but do not let it get too warm so that you don’t cook out the alcohol. Now add the lemon juice and the rum and keep the brew at this temperature for about 20 minutes.

    Finally add the cherry juice to the the Glühbier. Go easy on adding the juice because you don’t want a cherry beer, just a nice trace of cherry flavor in the beer.

    Cheers! May you find 2013 to be kinder to you and more in line with your dreams and hopes!

  2. Andrea Watt says:

    All the best Paul for a propserous 2013. It will be agreat year, you’ll see!

  3. Daphne Goulter says:

    Hi Paul
    Oh your post sounded quite depressed. I hope you can shake that feeling and get stuck into making changes for yourself in 2013. All days, years have similar things running through them, but then they also have many changes that can be regarded as “good” or “bad”, but that’s just labels.
    Go read, or look at the internet tv sites, for Eckhart Tolle, or Deepak Chopra. Or read anything you can find about the wonderful Will Smith.
    Get some good vibes into you along with the wonderful food you cook, and find something to inspire you for 2013.
    My daughter is in Vancouver, Canada and she’s also going through a huge “self-doubt” stage at the moment, like you seem to be. She has studied acting, singing, modelling, dance since she was about 7 Yrs old, and as a young adult has studied and paid out a fortune for acting classes and intensive programs bopth here and in Vancouver and done almost everythng she can to hone her skills in that area. (She is stuggling to earn enough to pay the bills and just live, let alone “make it” in the industry.
    She’s helped to write comedy for friends who film their own work, etc, but she now has a feeling that her hard work and dreams are not going to happen.
    I can only say what I said to her. Never, ever let anything or anyone stop you from striving for your dreams, especially yourself!!
    Luv ya mate.

  4. Paul says:

    Well said Daphne thank you!

    It often helps to get it out, put it on paper, have a good look at it and then see where you are at and what action you need to take to remedy the words and feelings as written.

    The concern remains but the determination has been amped up. Part of it is as your daughter is finding out – we are in a tough industry that often has no rhyme or reason but we stay in it? 2013 is a year I will continue on doing what I love doing when and if I can but also this year I must establish a new part of me – another arm or leg so as to provide not just financially but also creatively, spiritualy and joyfully.

    onward and upward or even sideswayward?!!?!

  5. Cory Marasco Wolfrom says:

    Hello Paul,

    I have been following your career since “Strictly Ballroom”. It is one of our favorite, fun,and zany movies. I also learned at the time of the film, that we are cousins. My grandmother, Josephine Mercurio Barber, and your grandfather, Vincent, were brother and sister. They were the youngest of nine children, which made them quite close all their lives. My parents were Celia and Mickey Marasco of Milwaukee. I remember your grandmother, Aunt Celia, as my mom referred to her. My parents enjoyed dining at The Patio. It would be so much fun to catch up with you and your lovely Andrea. The chance is upon us! My husband, Bob, and I are about to take a wonderful trip to NZ and Australia. We arrive in Aukland on Jan. 23rd. We have a cruise on the Diamond Princess on Jan. 25th. We have several NZ ports and then Hobart, Melbourne and Sydney. We then take a land tour to Cairns, Ayers Rock, Alice Springs, and back to Sydney, Feb. 12-15th. If there is any chance to meet, it would be fabulous! Let me know if any of this might work out for a meeting. I can send you more details via email. Bob and I are very youthful and active, even though we are retirees. We live in North Carolina. I hope to hear from you-this is going to be a great year, Paul!

  6. Paul
    All you can be reasured is:

    2011 was a year of change
    2012 was a year, if you had not made change, you would be thrust into starting to make change
    and lucky
    2013 will be the year of finshing.
    Trust the Universe! And go with it and not against it!!

    P.S.I just watched Bible – Joseph. I enjoyed it thoroughly!

  7. Paul says:

    Well Jan is almost over and I just wanted to let you know I have settled in to 2013 okay. The best thing is I have started to get back into a healthy routine – not all the way there yet but then Rome wasnt built in a day! I have had some pretty anxious days, some unpleasent people attempting to put me off my cheery dispostioin, I have had some personally fullfiling days without any real outcomes other than getting stuff done and I have ahcieved things still with out any real outcome because thats just how it is sometimes and why I wasnt all that pleased about 2013.

    Where to from here?


    and more of the same until some thing I do produces an out come – the outcome I am working towards. Typically however I am working on 3 or 4 fronts perhaps more and would like all those fronts to produce positive, properous, fulfilling and joyful results!

  8. Pamela Hurley says:

    Dear Paul,

    I often refer to STRICTLY BALLROOM to my psychotherapy patients and families where I primarily treat eating disorders and emotional trauma. So many people are afraid of change because they have been socialized to believe they have to follow a rigid template of how to be in the world. I believe sickness often manifests out of fear of losing one’s comfortable self and not risking leaving the shoreline to experience the wonders of the world. STRICTLY BALLROOM speaks to all of that, of course, ( I don’t have to remind YOU!). I hope you leave the script and re-invent yourself over and over again. You are an inventor and can cook up anything! 🙂

    An Adoring Fan,

    Pamela Hurley
    Denver, CO

  9. Paul says:

    Hello Pamela, thanks for visiting and posting here. I am glad SB is still creating change and opportunities for people to have a look at their own lives and take stock and perhaps make some decisions that can bring about some positive opportunities. As for change I seem to have never had a problem with it although I do some times take a step back and wonder why I seem to be in a continual cycle of change – I do yearn for a little bit of stability. But then life as a freelance actor, creator, experimentalist isnt so conducive to a life without spontaneity – which leads to a life lived with spontaneity is a life lived with constant change! Or a life lived in change is a life lived in spontaneity!

    I quite like the idea!


    • Pamela Hurley says:

      Hi Again, Paul……..
      I’m impressed with your replies back to your fans, (including your reply to my post). You haven’t let your fame interfere with your personal touch and caring of those who admire you…refreshing! And by the way, “stability” is over-rated (especially if it means sameness…yawn!). You’re so right to be smitten by the idea of a life being lived with spontaneity (which of course can only come about when you risk leaving the comfortable confines of stability). I think creativity and spontaneity create those “ah ha” moments…just remember to catch your breath before the next Ahh Ha….THAT is stability. 🙂

      Pam (the fan)

  10. Barbara Boyle says:

    Paul, I used to show “Joseph” when teaching an Old Testament class years ago. Wonderful movie. If you want significant change in your life, look up the Mormon elders there “down under.” My son spent 2 years in your lovely country in the Melbourne area and in Tazmania knocking on doors. You will find change of a pleasant sort in speaking with them. Have a great year.

  11. Paul will you be posting more messages – I like your outlook on life . Hope so.

  12. Let me be the first to wish you a happy 50th birthday in March. No midlife crisis I hope. A time to plan the future & get rid of bad habits- not that you have any.they can be great years.

  13. Hi Paul

    Welcome to 2013, what a great year to be alive!!!

    Paul, I met you late last year when you visited Hastings Library to promoted your great book “Cooking with beer” (I have made the Choc Stout Brownies, Lamb Shanks in Guinness & Meatloaf – delicious!!!)

    I have just started a Grad Certificate at Swinburne Uni Paul and my first piece of assessment is to use social media tools to create an interactive website. My team mates and I met today and decided to create a website to share brownie recipes and to find the worlds best brownie!

    We would LOVE to be able to feature your fantastic Chocolate Stout Brownie as the hero recipe on our site (fully credited to you). Would you be OK with us using your recipe in this way Paul? If you approve of this request it would be great if you could also give us a few words of endorsement for our project.

    Thank you for considering this request Paul, it really was great to meet you in Hastings last year, your relaxed manner and easy attitude was fantastic, you are just like you are on your TV shows, which is a really stupid thing to say but I am star struck and I have said it.

  14. Paul says:

    Hi Tanya no problem with you using my brownie recipe the only thing that you have to do is say it is from my book Cooking with Beer and that the book is published by Murdoch Books – this is a requirement from the publisher si it very important that you do this.

    let me know more about the project and how it goes and I can write a quick endorsement for you.

    cheers and good luck!!

    • That’s fantastic Paul, thank you so much. We are meeting via Google Hangout this Wednesday to finalise our recipes and then will start to build the site with the aim of going live on 14 April. I’ll send you a link once we are up and running. I might have to make another batch of stout brownies now in celebration!!! (oh and no problems re the publishers reference).. T

      • Hi Paul

        We are almost finished building out site and would love for you to have a look at it and tell us what you think. http://browniebrag.weebly.com/index.html

        We are refining our brownie photos and reducing the number of recipes we are going to have up at the start and will finish off by letting people know what the site is about on our About BB page – but as a little sneak peak for you…..

        The project aim is to create a site where the essence of it is food as a means of social interaction, in particular Brownies. The site will be live between mid April to late May and will be “advertised” to our classmates, friends and family with the hope that people will bake the recipes already on the site and then give us some feedback and rate them. We also hope that people will send us their brownie recipes to add to the site. Our ultimate aim, apart from getting a passing grade, is to have had so much interaction on the site that we can name the most popular brownie as voted by the people.

        If you would like to give us an endorsement of the project we would love to be able to put it on our home page beside our hero brownie, the Chocolate Stout Brownie (I wonder where we got that recipe from!!!)

        Thank you so much for your support Paul and happy belated 50th.


  15. Happy 50 th birthday. paulhope we will be hearing from you on your big day.

  16. kim says:

    hi Paul, you are still HHHHOOOTTT. xxxxxxx

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