Paul's Corner

Paul, I can't believe what I just read in your post. I can only imagine what a shock and disappointment it must have been for you and the rest of the cast to hear the bad news. I'm really sorry - for all of you. It seems very wrong and unfair that something this good should come to such an abrupt and premature end. I can't understand why you weren't playing to packed houses. It just doesn't make sense.

I am not going to try and encourage you to look at the positive things that could come out of it at this point in time. I'll just keep you close in my thoughts and send you my love,my support and my trust in you.

Mary

Paul, there's little that I could say about this news that's not obvious to anyone who reads your post.

One comment: I don't think that the show's publicity has been terribly effective in penetrating the potential market.
People just don't know that it's on, or they don't know how good it is.
It's not just the type of critical review that counts, it's how much it's in their face.
I really feel that the marketting could be better. Sorry, but unless I've been living on some other planet, I think this assessment is pretty right. The producers need to advertise more and appeal more to the public.
The public are generally lazy. There's also too much to choose from. They need to be told in a way that leaves an indellible promise that they WILL have a great time.
This is my objective, unbiased observation.

I offer this only as constructive comment.
I am extremely dissappointed and deeply sorry for you and the other cast members.

Last thing: It has absolutely nothing to do with how "worthy" the cast members are, it's more of a matter of the business aspect coming together. It's NO reflection. These things simply don't sell themselves. They need to be sold.

I hope to hell that this turns around, and quickly. Please keep us informed.

Best wishes,

Peter

Paul, I am also sorry for the disappointing news. I wish I could say something to make it better. I know you will get past this. All I can say is I wish you the best, I know it's lame but it's all I have.
Peace

I'm so sorry to hear it is closing early.

I am sure not only are the actors disappointed but many people who wanted to see the production. I agree that the music for it is not well known. Another "difficulty" with it is it is very much an adult comedy with a song on suicide ... not to mention the finale. This may keep families away.

Before I saw it I was not sure what to expect. I get bombarded with internet email that is really tiring. Frankily, I don't need anything to enlarge a part of my anatomy I don't have. I don't need to buy pain medications for shady doctors and I don't want or need any version of viagra. So when the tickets came for "The Full Monty" I thought, "Oh, no, not more of this junk."

But when I went, I really loved it. My two favorite characters were the granny piano player and the African American (hmmm... do you call them African Australians down under?).

It really was a good show.

I am sure that things are begining to roll in thr right direction for you and your family.

Best wishes,

Suzanne

Major bummer, Paul! But maybe serendipity has something else wonderful planned for you. You gained a lot of exposure (pardon the pun) with TFM and got into shape - mentally and phsyically - stepped up to the plate by your own standards. Whatever comes your way, you know you have the support and energy of all in your Corner.

Thinking of you,

Linda

Stunned into disbelief! What the hell is wrong with this world???? I can't even begin to imagine what that must feel like, the frustration, the disappointment, anger, disbelieve etc. but it makes me really sad for all of you who put yourselves out there and poured your heart, soul, energy and creativity into this project and did and do what you love to do. Damn it!!!! This really sucks--- sorry, I know my swearing doesn't make a difference, but I really don't have any tolerance for unfairness and this IS REALLY unfair!!! and I feel like venting to someone out there about the unfairness of it all. ARGGHHH! Well, I'm going to think about you and pray that doors will open, and that they do so quickly and that they be of the kind that are pleasant and fulfilling ones and not the kind that just allow you to scrape by somehow without being truly happy and doing something you love doing.
Truly annoyed by what has happened, but wishing you only the very best, especially now! Love & hugs to you!

Paul..
When I read your post, I wanted to cry. I am sure that I am not the only one who is sorry about the show. Take heart Paul, when a door closes in our lives, a window opens somewhere. You have nothing to be ashamed of in digging ditches, or any other kind of work to get by. I know you are not a "poor poor pitiful me" kind of guy, but are willing to work in any kind of job that will support you and your family.

You have the support of all of us here at PC, as well as the support of your family.

Keep looking forward with that postitive spirit that I know you have. I know that losing a job is really scary. I've had that experience twice and it wasn't something I wanted to go through again. It's like walking in the dark and not knowing that you are on the edge of a cliff, about to go over.

Being in the unique profession you are, it seems to be very fickle. You are a better performer than a lot of those Hollywood snots they are promoting in Hollywood. You were wise not to move there.

A little humor here. I came back from grocery shopping and the phone was ringing so I just dumped the bags on the floor. I forgot about putting them away and later discovered the my dog Lucy had eaten a half pound of lunchmeat. Needless to say she went to bed without any dinner.

Keep your spirits up Paul, we all love you for who you are and know that new opportunities will come your way. I hope you got the letters I sent to you and Andrea at the Melbourn Theater address.

Love to all at PC
Marge

Paul,
I am so sorry to hear this!
I have to agree with those that said maybe the ads needed a better spin. The piano playing granny was a new addition to the show, and some people have never experienced how much closer the actor and audience are in live theater, how much more a unit. And sad to say, some people may have thought, well, that sounds good, but it'll be around a while, so no big hurry.
I have a confession to make along that line...years ago Elvis, THE Elvis performed nearby in my no big deal state. Several months later he was back, and tho the first sold out fast, the second time was not so fast...we got complacent. Then he was gone. I am still kicking myself.
I bet there will be plenty of people down under kicking themselves,too. And more when the next project gets shelved because of the reaction to this one.
Hey, Paul, if we all could have been there, loving the show and cheering you all on . . .well, things could have been different.
warm hugs,
Sally aka deltalady

Wow. That's show biz, but that's also heart-rending. Paul, I wish you comfort which is hard to express but which is all I have.

thanks everyone for all your support and kind and sympathetic words... I rarely post but I feel everyone of your comments as if they were my own!
I know you wish us all the best and I just have to keep positive that something even more wonderful will come up for my beautiful talented husband....
All the best to everyone and thankyou
Andrea ( Paul's wife! )

Dear Andrea,

Keep that optimistic outlook..just as "I Robot" and "The Full Monty" were opportunites, there will be others.

With your unconditional love and support, the love and devotion of all of us on PC, and his own indomitable spirit, he can only succeed!

Much love,

Grandma

Daer Paul,

What can I possibly say to you that others here have not already said? I am heartbroken for you to say the least. This year started out to be so wonderful for you, and now this...

I have no words to comfort you, but just know that we all love you and are thinking of you now, and in the future.

Andrea,

You have such a good man there. I'm sure your love and support will help him through this trying time, and as in the past, he will prevail.

Gob bless you and your family.

Sally C.

Daer Paul,

What can I possibly say to you that others here have not already said? I am heartbroken for you to say the least. This year started out to be so wonderful for you, and now this...

I have no words to comfort you, but just know that we all love you and are thinking of you now, and in the future.

Andrea,

You have such a good man there. I'm sure your love and support will help him through this trying time, and as in the past, he will prevail.

Gob bless you and your family.

Sally C.

Well, shit... I've thought about this for the past hour and I'm afraid that's as profound as I can get right now. I'm just so sorry, Paul.

I'll bet when you wrote about TRUST this wasn't what you had in mind. Well, nothing to this degree I guess. I'm sure you're wondering what the old universe is playing at now.

What I do know is that you'll be ok. You are who you are, after all. AND you have your wonderful wife and girls who love you no matter what.

I wish I could say something that made a difference, but words fail me. Just know that I care and that I TRUST things will get better!

With love,
Michelle

Andrea
Thank you so much for your message here at PC. We would love to hear from you time to time. Congrats. on the test. We knew you were smart. Paul? Hmmmmmm

Paul
As you go into these final weeks, treat each performance as if it were opening night.

Like deltalady, I thought about going to events and waited too long.

Take the time you have off to enjoy your kids. Jump on the trampoline, take your daughter for a bike ride. Go on a romantic picnic with Andrea as if it was your firt date.

We are all here for you, Andrea and your girls. We know you will bounce back.

Take care, love to all
Marge

I will always make time to smell the roses, play with the kids and hug the wife for they are the truly wonderful things in my life.

Unfortunately I do not have the luxury of being able to spend more than one week out of work. In the security of knowing the musical was a long term gig and a safe bet (hahahaha) we finally spent our savings on fixing up our kitchen.The kitchen is much better now but if I dont get a job I wont be able to buy food to cook in it!! Crazy!!!

If it wasnt so serious I would laugh and if I wasnt so scared I would cry. But hey been there done that before, we will get through it,I just dont know how at the moment.

Trust in the universe? Guess I got to but some may wonder when my last post was about this subject how one can trust the universe. Yes Yes yes I know understanding what is going on, why the universe is throwing these "gifts" my way might help, but I dont know, probably dont need to know just need to grow with the changes and the challenges. I suspect if I knew I may be able to do something about it but maybe that is the controling factor - If I knew what to do I could control it and make it what I want?

Roll with the punches and get up and take those steps onward and forward. There is nothing else I can do, I just dont want to get hit anymore - know what I mean? I am so sorry for all the other guys in the show the cast and the crew. There are a lot of peolpe hurting, you can see it their faces as they stand in the wings waiting to go on.

Dearest Paul,

I feel that once you again are out seeking employment, you will find something. People will find out about the close of TFM, and with your name recognition, opportunities will come your way.

You worked as a technical consultant on "I, Robot". May I suggest that you network, contacting those people who know of your work, inside and outside of the industry? I hope your agent is also involved.

I read that the Australian economy has remained strong. If that is true, that is very positive!

We love you and your family, Paul, and with the love and support of your beautiful Andrea and your girls, we are confident you will prevail again!

Grandma

Dearest Paul,

I feel that once you again are out seeking employment, you will find something. People will find out about the close of TFM, and with your name recognition, opportunities will come your way.

You worked as a technical consultant on "I, Robot". May I suggest that you network, contacting those people who know of your work, inside and outside of the industry? I hope your agent is also involved.

I read that the Australian economy has remained strong. If that is true, that is very positive!

We love you and your family, Paul, and with the love and support of your beautiful Andrea and your girls, we are confident you will prevail again!

Grandma

Paul, it is hard to know what to say to you in words at the moment. I have found myself concentrating on thinking of you and your family and all the cast and crew affected by this decision... wishing you all well and hoping and praying for some positive outcome for all of you. All I can find to say is...to keep trusting in yourself. What the 'universe' can throw at any of us at any time,is anyone's guess. Any feelings of security that we think we experience in this life are,I think, an illusion. The only place we can build a base is within ourselves. To me, you are someone who has great inner strength. You may have developed this strength partly as a result of unwanted challenges that you have had to face so far, nevertheless, it is real and it is your security, enhanced by the love and support of a wife and children who, I think, know how lucky they are to have you at the centre of their lives (I believe just as much that you are lucky to have them). In the face of the uncertainty and the fickleness of what the future may hold, this is a real protection. As real as anything any of us could aspire to.

I don't want you to think that I am just telling you to count your blessings, because I am not. I can only imagine how difficult it must feel to be where you are at this time. I am just trying to find a truth in it and probably, a comfort for you, because I don't think you deserve this to happen to you, when you have always tried to be positive and brave in the face of other challenges. This part of you has been an inspiration to me. If any of us here in PC could change the way things are for you, we would. Unfortunately, all we can do is stand alongside you and Andrea and assure you both of our support and good wishes.

I do feel and hope, like Millie and Linda, that the exposure you have got through the show will work in your favour and that there is a really good chance that another opportunity will come your way. That's what I would hope for you.

Wishing you the very best,
Mary

Paul, like all those above have said, I am shocked and mad as hell. See that's where the sloppy accountants and business side of businesses can screw things up. It's all ahout $$ not art or the potential outcome. They should have moved you guys immediately to Sydney with a "successful send off" a huge big bash party welcoming you into Sydney etc. etc. etc.
Andrea is was so sweet to hear from you. We old PC'ers love to hear your input. I know the kind of support I get from my wife and four kids and how I couldn't do without it.
Paul it's just horrid to think what they've done, but in light of the time you are on stage...what is your agent doing? Who is he bringing to see you on stage? Don't kill me for saying this, many here in the states would die first, however they go under quite rich. What about a good soap opera for awhile. It's better than digging ditches. Meg Ryan, Demi Moore hail from a Soap. Just the possibility. A steady income for awhile. If not that, then other sources you know and they know etc.etc.etc. Network like HELL while you are on stage, and SHINE.
I'm behind you a 100% and you too Andrea. Don't look down but up. And you will not go hungry in your new kitchen.

love and peace

Tim

Paul, rollin' with the punches is not much fun.
It always hurts and eventually you end up pretty bruised. It's far worse when it's not your fault or doing.
I'm really sorry.

You are right, Tim.

"When I'm old and gray, I want to have a house by the sea. And paint. With a lot of wonderful chums, good music and booze around. And a damn good kitchen to cook in."

Ava Gardner

Hmmm...."Paul's Kitchen"....sounds like a good name for a cooking show, or at least a segment somewhere.
Paul, you must know someone in the right places?

Paul, you are a bright, creative lifeforce pressing your boundaries... a flower pushing towared the sun. When clouds come, you remember the light so well that you continue to press on in search of that light. There is no reason to ask why the clouds come. The closing of shows... the abortion of dreams... that is life and beginnings and endings.
Your light shines so brightly that it reaches around this globe in ways you cannot even imagine. The love of family and the responsibility you feel rise up and press you onward when you'd like to hide. The creative expression in you will find another outlet. That is certain. That is the trust.
As the years go by and your bones are not so springy and you voice wavers, you will find another way to express your creative self. For that is your birthright. Live on... live on... keep the memory of the bright lights and the applause and find another outlet for your dynamic self to express.
Deep breath...
Connie USA

Michelle, I totally agree with you and how you said it.

GOD, if I'd only won that $102million lottery, Paul, I could've helped you out. (Hell, I could've helped EVERYBODY here out! And believe me, if it happens, you're all comin to an all-epenses paid party at my house, no screw that, in Fiji) where you recieve your own private "thank you" from me for being such awesome people. It comes in the form of a check (or "cheque" for the Canuks) ;-)

Keep on dreaming, my friend. The bills will get paid. Haven't they always? (ok, mostly) ;-)

Grrrr...damned executives and their cheapass marketing techniques.

Dhi

What a shock! I am so saddened by this. It was such a short time ago that the high of TFM was shining here and now this. Almost impossible to imagine.

I guess this is as good a time as any to ask about Paul's Place. How are the plans for that coming?

I know this doesn't put food on the table but all of us here are heartbroken by the news and only want the best for you and your family. You have certainly created a lot of hearts around the world wishing the same thing for you. That has to be a powerful force.

All my love and best wishes,
Natalie

I'm so sorry to hear this news, Paul. How damned disappointing.
Another PCer who joins in wishing you well and hoping you'll hang in there. Here's hoping something really good will come along in spite of this temporary setback.

All my best wishes to you and your family.
The exposure (pardon pun again..) was good 'though..?

Hang tough!

Latte luv,

Katalina

Dhiana, it's always nice and refreshing to read your posts. You certainly add a bright element here :)

Paul,

Blessings can come in disguise! :)
Just like every storm, it eventually ceases. Soon the sunshine will shine again. You've overcome many challenges before, and you can do it again. I have faith in you!

Things come and go but love always endures. The love you give and the love that you get is something that not a lot of people have, and it is by far incomparable to any amount of money. As long as you have love, you can endure anything! You WILL endure anything! I have faith in you! We all have faith in you!

My best wishes to you :)

Dhiana, it's always nice and refreshing to read your posts. You certainly add a bright element here :)

Paul,

Blessings can come in disguise! :)
Just like every storm, it eventually ceases. Soon the sunshine will shine again. You've overcome many challenges before, and you can do it again. I have faith in you!

Things come and go but love always endures. The love you give and the love that you get is something that not a lot of people have, and it is by far incomparable to any amount of money. As long as you have love, you can endure anything! You WILL endure anything! I have faith in you! We all have faith in you!

My best wishes to you and your family :)

Not much to say today, other than it's flamin' hot here.

Paul, I hope things take an upward turn, soon.

Cheers

If you don't mind, Peter, I'll second that.

Paul, I hope things are okay with you.

Wishing you well,
Mary

The mood at PC has been understandably somber since Paul shared his news.
I'd like to wish only good things for Paul and all those others in need of relief or a bit of a lift.

There may not be a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but we can immerse ourselves in all of the colours and if we're lucky, bathe in the sunshine once in a while.

Here's to better times.

Yes, Peter, the mood has indeed been somber. Rightly so after what happened. And like you, I continue to wish Paul nothing but the best, now and with whatever comes his way. He knows we all love and support him.

Having said all that, I think we need to get on talking about other things. As someone who deals with depression on an ongoing basis, I understand when it's time for me to refocus. I would guess Paul is out there giving the best performances he knows how, and getting on with living. Not without worry of course, but just doing what he's got to do. I think I'll do the same by changing the subject just a little.:)

Peter, flamin hot? Better than scary cold! OK, maybe they're both annoying, but right now even 40F, which we haven't seen for over a month sounds like a heat wave. And...your rainbow image is lovely. I'll carry that with me for a while.

Linda, in the last thread you asked about Lidocaine patches? My only experience with Lidocaine is from when I worked for a group of periodontists. Lidocaine was the local anesthetic they used for nearly everyone. It worked well in mouths! The truly terrified got a Demerol drip.

Mary, how goes the book? As I said before I've started the second one, but now I'm also reading a Val McDermid mystery. I guess I needed to be distracted for a bit, so murder was in order!

Evelyn, any job news? I'll continue to send good thoughts your way!

Tim, I hope your pain isn't getting you down too much. Are you still tapping?

Dhiana, my sister, did you get your MegaMillions tickets for tonight? One of us HAS to win! I would love to invest in a brew pub... Best wishes to the red light girls!

To everyone else, I wish you all love! Hope I didn't offend anyone with what I said, I just felt it was time.

Paul, you're in my thoughts as always.

Love to you,
Michelle

Michelle, I doubt that anyone would take offence.
Good move.
When you fall, get up and run!

40 deg F?....Brrrhhhh. Good for polar bears.

Sunny but cooooold in Seattle .....another polar bear on the PC joining ranks.

Hugs to the PC gang,
latte luv,
Katalina

Michelle, I think you're right about giving the Corner a kick-start. I'm sure Paul does know how much we love and support him and really, what he probably needs most now is as much positive, up-beat energy as possible behind him. That's surely something we can give him here.

I am still enjoying the book very much, although I'm not getting as much time as I would like at the moment to read it. What I have found is that since I have begun reading it, I seem to be looking out, sometimes I think unconsciously, for evidence/signs of what Michael Newton is saying is the truth. A number of things in particular. One is the idea of us having spiritual 'family' here with us during our lifetimes. I think there is something in that idea. I have a few friends and certain members of my family with whom I have always said I had a 'soul' connection. In fact, some friends I would refer to as 'soulfriends' if I was describing them to someone. This kind of friendship can often have a familiarity about it from the first instant. I have other friends whom I am very close to and whose friendship I value very much, but this would not be how I would describe them. Likewise with other family members. (I seem to remember Peter saying something about this idea in a post a while back.) So the idea resonates in some way with me.

I also get now what you were saying about 'spiritual guides'. It would give me great comfort, I think, to believe that I had one. It's not that I haven't believed in the idea before now, it's just I'm zoning in on it now and reflecting on it. Then there's the idea of us having certain lessons to learn in a given lifetime..... There is so much I could say about that. I'll get back to you on it. I think I can safely say that I am glad I have found the book. Thanks again Michelle.

Peter, the rainbow is a beautiful image and and a very suitable one. Thanks. I once heard the singer Bob Geldof describe life as being a huge challenge with 'moments' of happiness, which we should relish in as much as possible.

Dhiana, I want to thank you in advance for the invitation to Fiji and your very generous spirit! That would be some party!!

Hello Jonathan, you're very welcome and welcome also to Connie.

Paul, you know the story. Thinking of you.

Hello to everyone here in PC and as Peter so nicely put it - here's to better times. (Sorry, Peter.. I seem to be jumping on the bandwagon a lot with you lately!)

Lots of love to you all,
Mary

Mary, I think the pace has picked up again.

Slowly, stealthily, life creeps up and throws a blanket over our best intentions, whilst all the time we stand with backs turned, but under the impression that we are facing it head on.
This life is just too bloody complex, sometimes!

Katalina, Sta cool in Seattle. Lifting a latte in your honour.

Welcome newcomers. I see there are several.

Weather here in Maple Valley (SE of Seattle)has been cool and sunny. At about 4:00PM it got up to about 48F too late to enjoy it before it started to get cold again. This kind of cold doesn't bother me, it's the rain rain rain that I get depressed with, I keep my "happy light" close at hand.

Katalina
Thank you so much for PC. I have never followed an actors career before, but I picked up on Paul's. The more I read about his life. the more I wanted to follow it.

Love to all from Maple Valley.
Marge

Peter, you are full of wisdom today! I love when you put your finger on something like this and make me think.

Take it easy,
Mary

Hey all!

Sorry I haven't written in a while...our computer has been really messed up and my mom has been using it a lot for her college classes.

Paul, i'm very sorry to hear about your post. If I was there I'd come every night to see you...every show!!!And I'd bring everybody i know

Love and care to all...Cara:)

Mary, You flatter me. Wisdom?....I dunno.
Maybe I just stumble across things from time to time. Stumbling is OK, I reckon.

Hey all!

Sorry I haven't written in a while...our computer has been really messed up and my mom has been using it a lot for her college classes.

Paul, i'm very sorry to hear about your post. If I was there I'd come every night to see you...every show!!!And I'd bring everybody i know

Love and care to all...Cara:)

Dearest Paul,

I want you to know that your gifts to us continue to enrich our lives. Case in point...Julie Chancellor came to visit Ellie and me the other day. It was a marvelous experience!

She is absolutely beautiful, (don't blush, Julie, it's true) so easy to talk with, and I know I made a wonderful choice when I told her I want to adopt her!

She and her husband live not far from us (only about a half hour on the parkway)...how lucky can we get!

We had met before at one of my shows, but never had the time to really talk. I showed her my shrine to SB and my computer room, covered with pictures of other PCers, like Whitney, Evelyn, Hannah and Margie from California. Then, there are the posters of you and Tara...We went out for lunch, and spoke to each other on the phone the next day also!

We met because of you and Cat, Paul. Although not everyone on PC is fortunate enough to extend hugs in person, you made it possible for all these wonderful people on PC to forge new friendships from all parts of this world.

Now we band together to say that we love you, Andrea, and the girls, and our thoughts are with you.

Grandma

Grandma Mil, I couldn't agree with you more. The people on this corner are so precious I wish I could travel the world and meet all of them.
Michelle, I'm in the same place as you temperature wise. It's been in the mid 30's this week and it feels just about tanning weather. I get so desperate for spring that it's almost painful. Only a few weeks away now.
Hi Katalina, nice to see you've been by. PM me babay!
Peter the Wise, I'd love if you could figure out how to get some of your weather to my hemisphere.
Mary is right though, you do have a way of seeing things that make people see things they probably wouldn't have.
Paul, chin up. My husband and I were both out of work last month and we're doing ok. It's one hell of a scary struggle. Plainly put it sucks, but perhaps you come out better on the other side.
Hello to to the Corner.
Peace

"Michelle, my belle..." girlfriend, the winning ticket will be in my wallet in exactly one half of an hour! After I walk over to get my BLACK, dull, tasteless, dull, thin, dull, boring excuse for coffee, that is. (I cut out sweeteners for one month and Oh look! I have cheekbones!!! But I MISS my thick, creamy, luxurious, soothing morning friend...waaaah.)

Peter, love...bite me! ;-) (and I say that with sisterly love of course...) It's a scorching 24F here, and I can't see out of my window due to the gigantic, plentiful, snowflakes. Thank my stars I'm LEAVING THIS TOWN Friday. Gah!!! Who chooses to live here? Freaks?

Redlight Girl Update - They broke their heatlamp so to hell with 'em. At $12.95 per red-heat bulb, they can huddle up and made due! Actually, we put in more straw and changed their shavings so they're all snug as bugs anyway. Of COURSE they raided my wildbird feeders yesterday for two hours when we--sporadically--saw the sun. But they DO give me laughs and make me smile--little buggers, better than most of the rest of my life some days! Chooks are good therapy!

Did y'all see the New Westminster Best of Show CHAMPION? The Newf won! woopie!!!! I totally stuffed that in my terrier fancier friends' faces...because I am the epitome of sweetness, kindnes and light, of course. NOT!!! Big slobbery cutie-pie...(the dog, not me!).

Peter the Wise. Oh yes, that fits. Wear it well, my friend.

Hugs all around, as per usual. (((squeeze)))
Dhiana
(Proud Newfie owner...although mine would be hard pressed--to say the least--to even make it through ONE grooming session such as the show coat would require. Pah! Leave him stinky...he matches the house better that way anyway.)

Dhiana
That "Newfy" was gorgeous! Did you see that little Pomeranian in the Toy group walk right up to the judge as if to say "Look at me" I thought it was the highlight of the show. Notice that Les the Pekineze made the best of show group again. He and his buddy Eddie from England most always win their best of breed class. Soneone once said they move like there is a bump in the carpet. My Peke Gizmo would look just like that if I didn't keep him clipped.

I must have missed something. What kind of animals to you have.

Cara
Glad to hear from you. Someone told that a person has a clean house when their computer is down. My House, I won't go there.

Gran Mil
I also agree with Dhiana that this corner has become a wonder family for me.

Yes Peter, you have wisdom and compassion.

Has anybody become aware of the new Mel Gibson's "Passion" movie? It has created quite a stir. Some churches here have rented entire theaters to view this. I will probably wait until the hoopla dies down to go see it. The current Newsweek has quite an article. Like most "Jesus" movies, it is contraversial. Pull up his name on the web. Mel Gisson has had his entire life envestigated. What really pissed him off was that someone had even investigated his father.

I'm off to the dentist. Bummer!

Take care,
Love to all,
Marge

Marge, best of luck with the dentist. Hope it's only a flying visit to check in.

Peter, stumbling is just fine by me.

Cara, I just loved the way you told Paul that if you could, you would be at every show along with everyone you knew. I think that came from the heart and I feel Paul will think so too.

Grandma Mil, what a lovely post and how well you summed the whole thing up. What Paul has drawn together here is a truly wonderful group of people and as Michelle puts it so well...he is the light at the centre of the circle that draws us all here.

Diane, I send good wishes. I hope all is well with you.

Tim, hope the pain is easing for you.

Inn, Michelle, Katalina, Dhiana and all the other polar bears/snow leopards/huskies who visit here - I wish you all inner warmth and lots of loving around you to keep out the big freeze.

Actually, I wish the same to everyone else here. Not because you're ambushed by the cold but just because it would make you feel good!

Love to Paul and Andrea and all the PC cobbers,
Mary

Dhiana,
YEAH! Newfies rule!! You have no idea how loud we hollered when Josh won Best of Show. We got our Newf last April after our chow-chow died and what a trip it's been! We give out "slobber towels" to anyone who visits - I'm sure you know why? We go to obedience school every Wednesday for 6 weeks - hope our "big guy" learns a few basics by the time school lets out. ;o)

Marge,
Yes, lots of talk about Mel Gibson's movie. I see where Diane Sawyer will interview him this week, so I want to make sure I see it or at least tape it for later. Religion and politics always stir up people's emotions.

Hey Peter,
Can you bottle some of that red hot sunshine and send it my way, too? I am sooo tired of all this cold weather! Can't tell you the last time I saw the sun and now we hear there's another "potential winter storm" looming on the horizon.
Help!

Here's a cute e-mail I got today. Thought it might give everyone a little tickle...

The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you've started.

So, I looked around the house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished... and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of red wine, a bottle of white wine, the Bailey's, Kahlua and Wild Turkey, the Prozac, some Valium, some cheesecake and a box of chocolates.

You have no idea how good I feel...

You may pass this on to those you feel are in need of Inner Peace...

Hi to all my fellow PC'ers. Good wishes to Paul. Hope you're hangin' in...

Sally C.

Sally, you really made me laugh! Can't imagine what you'll feel like by this afternoon, though.
That request about bottling sunshine is a bit silly. Everyone with any scientific knowledge knows that you have to use steel cans, or the light will escape. I'll start canning.

Inn, mid 30's huh?...lucky you.
I cannot imagine both being out of work (not at all lucky - more like scary). You must retain a very strong outlook to have coped with that predicament. Phew.
Peter the wise?!!!..Oh please!....just plain Peter.

Dhiana, ..you're a wicked woman.
I'm not completely sure of the expression "bite me". I suspect it may have a slighty different meaning in your neck of the woods. Hey, do woods really have necks?
Why don't you get the chooks some coloured disco lights? Throw in a few UV stobes. Should make for interesting eggs.

Marge, I sincerely but humbly thank you for that compliment. (Inn too!)
Dentist?....Errr.

Mary, thankyou. I'll stumble on. Who knows what I might find?

Cara, welcome back.

Grandma Mill, It's truly lovely that Paul's Corner has brought so much real joy to your life and to those of others.
Good people have an infectious way of bringing other good things together.
We are all indeed fortunate.
Also, it's wonderful that you have been able to meet Julie.

cheers all,

The wind started blowing bit again. Uh-OH Fortunately it stopped and we had a balmy sunny 52F today. Mountain's out! Mountain's out! When we get sunny days, we can see Mt. Rainier, which is beautiful.

Peter
"chook" It means chicken. Looked it up in my Azzie Dictionery. Right? Do I undetstand correctly that you are out of work too? What a bitch. Networking! Networking! Networking! What kind of work do you do? I'll keep you in my prayers along with Paul and some others I am praying for.

The dentist was not a "flying visit" I had to have a tooth pulled that could not be saved. Now I am on anti-biotics and pain killer. Kind of have a buzz on. My dentist is called Loving Dentistry. She is wonderful! I don't even get that "socked in the jaw" feeling when the novocaine wares off.

Love to all at PC
Marge

Marge, Yes, "chook" means chicken.

NO,NO!...I am NOT out of work. I was referring to Innussiq's predicament last month.
I have work coming out of my ears, both of them.
I am a consultant project engineer (electrical).
I have my own small company (just me and a contract draftsperson). I've been solo for 4 years now and the demand has been overwhelming.
I've been doing capital works projects for about 20 years, management, technical design, auditing, safety systems and stuff like that.

I work for cement manufacturers, quarrying and surface mining groups.

By now you're probably sorry that you asked!

Sunny 52F huh?...sounds nice. I like cool weather, but not too cold.

Your dentist sounds wonderful (as people go who shove their fingers in your mouth).
I hope there's no residual pain when the drugs wear off. I'll think of you.

best wishes

I share everones admonition to change to a happier mood. I for one could use one. I've found myself, almost overnight, in a deep depression. The drugs have turned on me I guess. It's been difficult. Job issues, home issues, on the verge again. God I'm so sick of it. The pain drives me crazy too. I mixed two Kadian pills last week with xanax and I basically blacked out at work. I had forgotten when I had taken my drugs, I'm getting very forgetful. Today I must have left my keys at the bank, b/c I had to use my spare to get to tap class. Yes I'm still tapping. Me and the boys, but it's not even picking me up right now.
So hey Paul and everyone...there are people suffering out there...me for one.
I've been having a lot of big "S" thoughts lately. My psych is not avail. till the 25th and called and said it was an emergency...What the fuck. I want to end it all and they put me on hold. That's my luck.

Be thankful for what the good you have. People that don't have the grips of depression on them at least they can enjoy mental stability for me I only visit that illusion for periods of time.

I wish the best to everyone. I hope things pickup or go well for everyone.

god help...

peace and love

tim

Cheerfulness is always the best medicine... although sometimes very very hard... we should not forget how to smile : )

: ) SMILE, it's good for you : Þ

Tim, I'm certain that everyone at PC wishes that you quickly get some relief from the back pain, sadness and grief
The drugs can really mess with you, but sometimes they are a necessary evil, so to speak.
Keep on tapping and as Johnathan said, try to keep on smiling. It might help to carry you through.
Sometimes I get a little burdened, but I try to turn it around by finding some irony in the situation and making a private joke with myself.
Often this will do the trick for me. Humour helps and when it's your own, there's no rules, therefore no restrictions. It can be a soothing friend.

Be well Tim.

Tim, know dear man, that your physical presence, though dreadfully painful and upsetting now, would be SORELY, sorely, sorely missed from us if you chose to disappear. That, my friend, would leave another hole in our already pocked hearts (the brothers, mums, friends, fathers that we've lost while together here). So, you are LOVED, dear one! Hang in there. For us.

(There! How's THAT for some good old fashioned CAtholic guilt? I guess living across the road from a rectory must've wafted some fumes across the way...) ;-)

Love ya, dude. ;-)
Your Friend and Psycho Counsellor
Dhi

Peter, dahling..."Bite me!" is the equivalant of "Bugger off!" but you can say the former in delicate company (Millie, for example- ;-) and have them not be too entirely offended. And yes, I attest to being a wicked woman. Proudly. ;-)

The chooks are DEFINITELY going to need the heat-lamp by Sunday--10F is the predicted HIGH! Hopefully the housesitter will remember to turn the danged thing on while we're away. Rainy and cool is the forcast for Daytona Beach, but I don't CARE! Tossing on a sweatshirt to go play miniature golf sure beats the space suit I've needed to tackle the shovelling. BLeah.

Oh, Peter, I forgot - in case you were thinking of getting some of what you do documented, I'm your gal. It's what I do. Here, for the software developers I write the requirements, specs, and Help files. User documentation has been my (gag) specialty apparently, because the customers keep asking for me, so if you ever need a third set of arms, let me know!

Meeting. Bleck.
Dhi

I'm stealing the heat lamps from Dhi's chooks. It's predicted to be 16F this week, the rise and fall of the temps is like being on a see-saw without the fun. Jeese, being fat white and surrounded by snow, I think I've turned into a polar bear!
Tim, please hang in there. What would your boys do without you. Yes they have a Mom but those of us who have lost their Dads will attest there is no replacing him.
Chronic pain is terrible to deal with, I'm off today for a cortizone shot in the hip. Unlike most people I don't find the benefits outweigh the pain of the shot but my Dr. insists I try since the technology has improved since my last one 20 years ago. I'm not fond of needles..to say the least.
Hello to all at PC.
Peace

Tim, I think it's important to realize that the Kadian (morphine) can cause depression. That itself doesn't make you feel any better, believe me I know, but it's important to realize that this drug might be making things worse. Does your doctor think it's ok to take the Xanax while on Kadian? There can be some problems there from what I've read. Maybe your doctor could taper it down a bit? By the way, I'm not suggesting you stop any meds, that could cause withdrawal (which you don't need right now), but just be aware of the drugs potential side effects where your mood is concerned.

Please, Tim, if nothing else remember this: Depression distorts EVERYTHING. Problems that seemed manageable before seem insurmountable when your depression kicks in. That distortion IS NOT REAL. It sure as hell feels real, I know it so well!! But those problems with family, work, etc., they were there before and you made it through, just like you will this time. Yes, the problems are real, but your reaction to them is different right now because of the depression and the meds you're on for pain. Be gentle with yourself and know that this shall pass. You've done it before and can do it again.

Also, does your doctor leave another doctor on call in case of emergency? There's got to be someone available for you to see, the sooner the better. You deserve that. Fight for it.

And Tim, as shitty as you feel right now, suicide is no answer. Remember how Paul feels about Michael? Your life is worth living, for you and all those that love you. Look, I've felt the way you're feeling and I know having someone tell you they understand doesn't matter much when you're in the black hole you're in, but I DO know. I fight to stay out of there all the time. I'm better now than I used to be, but I never forget. E-mail me anytime.

Love to you,
Michelle

Tim, struggling with depression is, I think, one of the most difficult challenges that this life has to offer. Anyone who has to battle with it has to draw on every ounce of courage and persistence and strength of will that they possess. I have not been here long enough to remember when things were very difficult for you before, but from what I can gather, you went down very low before making your way back up. I have to tell you Tim, that I have always considered you to be a very intelligent, compassionate and sensitive person, the type of person I value very much in my life. In my journal I have written down some words of advice that you have given different people over the months that I have visited the Corner and in the months beforehand. You wrote something about the past a while back which has helped to refocus me very much at low times. Why am I saying all this to you? Because, in my opinion, you are a person who has so much to offer anyone who comes into contact with you. You have a purpose in being here, which I think everyone here can see and appreciate. Inn is so right when she says that your children need the father in you. I know what a positve influence on a person a good father can be. Your children are very lucky to have been given you as their Dad. Keep remembering that. I am so sorry that you are under attack again from the greyness and emptiness that depression can bring, but please, please try to hang in there and believe that it WILL start to lift. The pain is either not helping or causing your resistence to wear low, so I will pray that it starts to ease for you and that you will find the right balance of medication to get you back on track. I will also pray for endurance for you and belief in your self-worth. With these prayers, I send you my love and my support. I wish there was more I could do for you. Take good care.

Inn, I really hope these injections will make a difference. If you haven't tried something like this in that long, it could be hopeful. Wishing you well too.

Marge, sorry about the tooth. Hope it heals quickly for you.

Dhiana, I can see why the customers would keep asking for you. You seem to have the ability to lift people. You've done this for me many times here. I can only imagine what a boost it must be for people to meet you in person!

Peter, I don't want to start complimenting you again (you might start to get a big head and there'd be no living with you!),but.... I just KNOW by you that you're extremely competent at your job. Blame the teacher's instinct in me! I'm not surprised you're doing so well. I hope it will always be so.

Hello Michelle and Millie. Hope you are both well.

Paul, wherever you are and whatever you're doing..I wish you the best.

Hi to everyone else in the Corner!

Lots of love,
Mary

Tim
I was minutes away from looking for an 18-wheeler on a local highway to run into. I got help and am now on anti-depressents. I am too curious about what the future will bring. I had a quad bypass, sat with my mother when she passed away, and also my husband. God has a purpose for me here on earth, but I haven't yet found out what it is. Hang in there buddy. I have been in that black hole of depression. When I forget to take my meds, I can feel depression rearing it's ugly head. Remember; yesturday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is the present that has been given to us.

On a positive note. It is sunny here a nice 54F. The weatherman said it got up to 60f somewhere. Broke a record. Wish I could bottle it up and send it to anyone who needs it.

Gran Mil
Will yo be going to see the new Mel Gibson movie, "Passion"? The current Newsweek has a big write up about it.

My jaw is a little sore, but healing well. Tomato soup, mashed potatoes, liquid diet for a couple of days.

Finishing things you have started. No I didn't have any of the things to finish like Sally C. did. But the room that I have my computer in, I call it my DWIL room. "Deal With It Later"

I'm off to get my taxes done. Yuk!! Then go horse around, literally.

Take care and love to all at PC
Marge

Hi, Mary! I wanted to tell you that I've been "looking for evidence" as well. The book made me look at life from a different perspective, maybe even a more positive perspective. I have to say I like the way it makes me feel about life, so that's a good thing! I'm still fascinated by the concept of spirit guides, and I'm sure I have one (are you there?), but no real feelings of connection. Yet. I do try and write to him/her when journaling, sometimes letting them have it for not helping me in a more constructive way!;) As for our soul family, I have several people who I feel a deep connection with, some family, some not. The feeling is unmistakable when it happens, though. It comes from a totally different place inside you.

Inn, I hope the cortisone helps. My dad gets shots for spinal stenosis and they really help him. Let's hope the shot-giver is gentle!

Marge, I'm sorry about your tooth. Glad to hear it doesn't hurt too much. By the way, your weather sounds wonderfully balmy!

Dhi, can you believe we didn't win the lottery? Oh well, neither did anyone else. I think it's up to 150 million, so that should do us! I wish I could be there to take care of the red light girls for you, poor things. Much more of that light and their eggs might start glowing!

Peter, my friend, all I have to say to you is that I wish I was there. At least the fact that I know someone who is IN a warm place is comforting in some warped, deluded way. Whatever gets you through the winter... I do love your little bits of wisdom that you share with us. They help more than you know.

Hi Jonathan, Katalina, Grandma Mil, Sally C and Cara!

Be Well,
Michelle

Dhi, what does "bugger off" mean?

Catholic guilt - Oooo. I was brought up Catholic, yet that bleak aspect NEVER struck me.
I heard about it, but it did not make any sense, so I ignored it. Much better.

Thankyou for making me aware of your professional skills.
My, you are a multi-faceted talent!
I always do my own specifications etc, but if I ever need a hand with some IT style work, then I shall most definitely give you a call.

Mary & Michelle, thanks to you both.

My Dear Timmer,

Considering the meds that you are taking for your physical pain, it is no wonder you feel depressed!

I would suggest that you find a doctor that will help you get through this difficult time. A regular psychiatrist is not enough. I would suggest that you find a psychopharmacologist, who is a psychiatrist, but is also a specialist in the good and bad of all kinds of medications and their side effects. In a city as large as Atlanta, there should be at least one or two of them! Call the local medical society.

Perhaps you need a special high potent antidepressant, not the namby-pamby drugs of today. I am speaking of the MAO inhibitors, like
Parnate. Please ask the doctor about this one, Tim. Everyone on PC is concerned, and how lucky we are to be a part of such outstanding and compassionate people, learning from the experiences of each. We love you!!!

Marge, I saw clips of Gibson's "Passion". It is extremely violent, and will probably rate an R, and will undoubtedly stir the passions of many people, pro and con. Gibson's father has already stated that the Holocaust never happened, and
that's why there is so much discention as to Gibson's true intent.

If his father would come to our retirement
community, and meet a hundred or less Holocaust
survivors, with the death camp numbers still tattooed permanently on their arms, he may be persuaded to change his tune, especially if they sit down and tell him of their harrowing experiences during the dark ages of World War 2 when they were youngsters.

Stephen Spielberg taped thousands of interviews of the survivors from around the world, so the truth could be documented for future generations.

Peace and Love,

Grandma

My Dear Timmer,

Considering the meds that you are taking for your physical pain, it is no wonder you feel depressed!

I would suggest that you find a doctor that will help you get through this difficult time. A regular psychiatrist is not enough. I would suggest that you find a psychopharmacologist, who is a psychiatrist, but is also a specialist in the good and bad of all kinds of medications and their side effects. In a city as large as Atlanta, there should be at least one or two of them! Call the local medical society.

Perhaps you need a special high potent antidepressant, not the namby-pamby drugs of today. I am speaking of the MAO inhibitors, like
Parnate. Please ask the doctor about this one, Tim. Everyone on PC is concerned, and how lucky we are to be a part of such outstanding and compassionate people, learning from the experiences of each. We love you!!!

Marge, I saw clips of Gibson's "Passion". It is extremely violent, and will probably rate an R, and will undoubtedly stir the passions of many people, pro and con. Gibson's father has already stated that the Holocaust never happened, and
that's why there is so much discention as to Gibson's true intent.

If his father would come to our retirement
community, and meet a hundred or less Holocaust
survivors, with the death camp numbers still tattooed permanently on their arms, he may be persuaded to change his tune, especially if they sit down and tell him of their harrowing experiences during the dark ages of World War 2 when they were youngsters.

Stephen Spielberg taped thousands of interviews of the survivors from around the world, so the truth could be documented for future generations.

Peace and Love,

Grandma

Grandma, Well said. Any fool who thinks the holocaust didn't happen is romancing themselves.
My dad was in one of the camps.
Enough said.

hello paul how are you doing do you listen to music like 50 cent christina aguilara simple plan alicia keys beyonce knowles.

(Peter, you jester you...;-)

Michelle - we've got another chance, girlie...yep, $150mil. That ought to do it, eh?

Thanks for the compliment, Mary. It drives some people crazy, but they're all grumps to begin with. ;-0

I'm going home to pack. ;->
Dhi

Tim...I feel for you! I am still on the recovery track after back surgery. I must learn to walk all over again. My doctor perscribed Lidocaine patches which help the pain big bunches (Thanks, Michelle, for your opinion of them.) One patch gives relief for 12 hours and affects only the hurting part of you. After 10 days, I am now only using one once a day and it works wonders. I wish you hope.

Thinking of Paul and all those in his Corner.

Linda

Linda, Hi. I have a great deal of both empathy and sympathy for anyone recovering from back problems. It's very tough.

Thinking of you also.
Peter

THANKS

I appreciate everyone's concern. It's reassuring to find that in your low point there are people out there that think you are special for some purpose. Auntie Mil, I'll check into that Dr. you recommended maybe that is what is needed. I did ask about the drug interaction at the pharmacy, and they weren't too concerned with me taking it together, but who knows.

I do have to face today as its given and realize tomorrow is a mystery and it could be great.

Thanks so much for the caring thoughts.

Speaking of Mel's movie. This goes way back to my religious background, I was raised a Jehovahs Witness. They were branded as well in Hitlers camps and had to wear purple patches. They had numbers branded into them as well. You can see so much of it at the Holocaust Museum in D.C. I don't doubt for one second someone got that distorted and got away with it. Think about it we are what 60 years beyond that now and there are so many places in the US that have people in the streets with no home, no healthcare, no food, there are slums, our tax dollars get eaten up on non descript projects that produce nada. It's not the same granted, but we have plenty of people in pain out there in the streets and in public housing that need more help and what gives? I'm going to see his movie. I want to see what he says. And what about this stem cell stuff going on? Hmmm!

Well nuff said from me right now. I'm working on going up.

Group hug to the corner, I appreciate the help as always.

And Paul..I wish you the best and I'm always sending positive thoughts your way. Even in my shitty moments I've thought about various people you included and thought..they'll make it and do great. I know you will.

peace and love

Tim

Tim, you've been on my mind all evening. It's good to hear from you. Keep your heart up.

Millie, denial about the holocaust is as close to unforgivable as you can get and a sad reflection on anyone who even entertains the idea.

Marge, you've really been through a lot. Your attitude to life at this point is a credit to you.

Michelle, you're right! My perspective HAS shifted and it is in a positive way... Maybe like a good teacher, your spirit guide knows when to stand back and trust in your ability to deal with challenges. A good teacher will always be in the background but not necessarily in an obvious way to the student.

Linda, wishing you continued healing.

Up too late again....to bed now.

Take care all,
Mary

I heard Mel's movie was gave off the impression of anti-semitism... this kinda concerns me.

It's also sad that people would think that such a dreadful event like the holocaust didn't happen.

Tim, I see it also. There are so many hurting people out there. So many people in darkness. It just goes to show you how messed up this world is starting to get.

However, there is that one saying that goes something like this: "The only way for evil to win is when good men to do nothing". I think that's from the movie Tears of the Sun.

The best thing we can do is maybe change the world one person at a time eh? Here's a thought: How can we make ourselves feel better when life seems to suck? Do something nice for someone else :) IT WORKS!

Take care everyone!!! :)

There is also that one story... one that you've all probably heard:

A man is walking along the ocean and sees a
beach on which thousands and thousands of starfish have washed ashore. Further along he sees a little boy, walking slowly and stooping often, picking up one starfish after another and tossing each one gently into the ocean.

"Why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?," he asks.

"Because the sun is up and the tide is going out and if I don't throw them further in they will die."

"But son, don't you realize there are miles and miles of beach and starfish all along it! You can't possibly save them all, you can't even save one-tenth of them. In fact, even if you work all day, your efforts won't make any difference at all."

The boy listened calmly and then bent down and picked up another starfish and threw it into the sea. "It made a difference to that one."

I just found the real quote. Here it is:

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing"

Do something nice for someone today. It'll make you feel better whenever you feel like crap :)

Hello everyone! I've meant to participate in this discussion, but been unexpectedly very busy, both good and not so good, but that's fine. Haven't read all the posts too closely, but just wanted to say a few things:
Tim, hang in there, don't give up, I'd miss you if you weren't here!!! And here are some bright happy thoughts for you to lift your spirits.

Linda, Inn & Tim and everyone else dealing with pain, my thoughts are with you and may you find relief from the pain or a good way through it.

Some good news from me (that timing was rather interesting!!!): I got a phone call Monday with an invitation to an on-campus interview in the St. Louis, MO area, on the IL side, from one of the December interviews. I made it into the final round and am one of 3 finalists for that job. :) Will leave next Wed for a 2 day interview process (Th & FR). I'm excited, somewhat nervous and wishing they'd tell me what exactly it is I will be doing there, other than having lots of individual interview sessions with faculty in the department, students, deans etc. I’d kind of like to know what class I’m supposed to teach and what kind of lecture/presentation they want me to give and for what audience and anything else I need to prepare. They’ve been kind of laid back about it, which I like, but also don’t like, esp. when I feel I don’t have a lot of prep time. Last weekend, prior to this call, I was sliding into an emotional slump, since time seemingly had run out for getting this next round interview, as all places said they’d decide in January. Hearing what happened to Paul kind of added to my own frustration and angered me endlessly. I did take some time to deal with my feelings and considered all sorts of options as to what I can and want to do professionally and on what continent, and I was stuck with this question “Do you trust me, the universal power, enough to take care of you and get you where you want to go?” and “Do I trust myself and believe in my talents and skills instead of letting the seemingly negative feedback strip me of my sense of worth and self esteem?” I find it incredibly difficult not to let doors closing in on me and closing before me affect my sense of self-esteem both personally and professionally, but I emotionally wrestled with myself and did reach a totally calm and more hopeful space within me, after putting my trust in myself and the universe out there. Within about 12 hours I got this phone call. I don’t know if I’m going to get this job or not, I only know, if this is where I’m supposed to be and want to be, it will happen, if not, something else will come up, eventually, when the time is right for it. I wish I could share that inner tranquility, that sense of feeling incredibly blessed, the calm in the middle of uncertainty which I’m experiencing at the moment with anyone who needs it right now, but especially with you Paul, Andrea, Emily, Elise & Erin. I believe in sharing good things that come my way, so please have some of it.

Love, hugs and happiness to each and everyone and as a few others have said it already, find something to smile and laugh about. It has the power to lift spirits.

Ps. Peter, you have no idea how right you were in your prediction that I would love teaching in the private sector. I started that second job 2 weeks ago, and it's been amazing!!! Incredibly refreshing, fun and motivating for me and I've already learned so much about me and improved some professional skills. Working two jobs has been tiring, but in a weird way also very energizing.

YAY Evelyn!

Good thoughts, Jonathan.

Didn't mean to slam your Catholicism, Peter. Utmost of respect for you, as usual. (Frankly, the guilt in that sitch seems to be regarding Irish female daughters--SERIOUSLY-my own observation of course. Nothing written in the tomes or anything.)

A word on Topic-
I will fall into a beautiful, restful sleep with my children, in the back of the van, for the 4 hours that my husband will be at the wheel in the middle of the night, driving 80mph and (historically) scaring the sh** outta me with lane changes and abrubt brakings.

Now THAT's trust. (praying fervently that this occurs)

Bye all! Have a good enough week.
Dhiana

*abrupt...I meant abruPt. Gah!

Evelyn, I'm so happy to hear about your second round job interview. I admire your calmness about going into it without a lot of information. I don't think I'd be that easy going. I have a very strong "need to know" - which drives people in my life crazy.

Tim, I was so happy to hear from you. I have been where you are and know how hard that dark place is. You really do have to just keep putting one foot in front of the other until it becomes easier. Surround yourself with loving people and KNOW that it will get better. I know it doesn't seem like it but it will.

Peter, Dhiana and the rest of you crack me up. I love reading about your days.

I'm in that phase of parenthood where I develop tunnel vision so it is nice to hear that other people have other lives. I have a two and a half year old and I can't seem to get anything done that I want to do. I hate it! My other two are 10 and 12 and they are sort of a breeze. The 12 year old is going skiing for a week but the 10 year old needs me. She is going through something where she just wants to spend time with me. Fortunately, she is nice to hang out with but she has so much more energy than I have that it is exhausting. Yesterday she and I baked Valentine's cookies for school today and she was the happiest kid on the planet - having that time with me. I know that I need to do more of that but it is so hard. We do have a girls weekend away planned in a couple of weeks and that will be fun.

Sam, the two year old, is exhausting. He knows what he wants, how he wants it, when he wants it and no amount of talk will disuade him. I could always distract my other kids, "Look! A fire truck." They would forget about what they were going on about. Not Sam. He won't forget a thing until he gets whatever it is he wants. It's not like he makes horrible demands. Just things like lunch or to read a book. But I'm old and tired, I've done this before and I want to read MY book.

I console myself with the notion that once they are gone I'm going to miss them like crazy. And I know I will.

Okay, off kids and onto dogs. My dog this morning was going nuts with a raw hide bone. She walked around the house with it in her mouth and whined like crazy. I finally let her outside and she ran out and buried it. What is that about? Normally she just chews them up but not this time. Anyone understand the mind of a dog?

The crappy weather is back. I'm so bummed I can't even tell you. And I have to do some replanting outside which won't be much fun now. I knew I should have done it yesterday but I forgot.

Enough sitting here now. Time to engage the youngster. His mind has been numbed by TV long enough this AM. That being said, the person who invented TV is my hero. I wouldn't get to read what's going on at PC without it.

Natalie

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY TO EVERYONE!!
Am a little late for those of you "down under".

Paul - Beer alert
My husband's boss was a beer judge. I guess they have beer tasting, just like wine. Every Christmas, Larry would get a gift of a dozen bottles of one of a kind beers. I did sample some of these, but as I am not a beer drinker I found some of them kind of wierd. Lagars, Ale,etc.
I know that you like to cook with beer. I have a beer batter recipe that I use for deep frying, mainly fish (Halibut) that I would like to share with you and everyone else..
2 cups flour, 3 tsps baking powder,
1 can beer, salt, 2 egg whites (stiffly beaten) Slowly pour beer into a large bowl, add all ingredients into the beer and gently stir until mixed, then gently fold eggwhites into the batter. This serves 10, but you can cut it in half. You may already have a variation of this, but I thought that I would pass it on anyway.

Timmer
I am keeping you in my prayers? Keep going one step at a time, one day at a time. I'm with Grandma Mil. Please take her advice and inquire more about the MEDS you are taking, in regards to your depression.

My tooth extraction is doing fine. Weather here is borderline sun and clouds, going back into rain. yyuukk!!!

Love to all. Take Care
Marge

Hello!!

Happy Valentines Day for tomorrow! I probably won't be able to type tomorrow so thought I'd say something now. Or, actually, it could be other days since I know PC's is written by people from all over. Anyways, I hope you all have a nice and fun day and a relaxing one for you, paul.

love..cara:)

Hello!!

Happy Valentines Day for tomorrow! I probably won't be able to type tomorrow so thought I'd say something now. Or, actually, it could be other days since I know PC's is written by people from all over. Anyways, I hope you all have a nice and fun day and a relaxing one for you, paul.

love..cara:)

Hello!!

Happy Valentines Day for tomorrow! I probably won't be able to type tomorrow so thought I'd say something now. Or, actually, it could be other days since I know PC's is written by people from all over. Anyways, I hope you all have a nice and fun day and a relaxing one for you, paul.

love..cara:)

Hi guys,

My, I get sick and depressed, disappeared for a while, and now return to find that Paul and his fellow actors will be out of a job soon, and Tim has been ultra depressed! I also have read the posts in answer to both events and the love and concern expressed by all the PCers is really amazing. :-)

Paul, I'm so sorry that show business has proven to be unreliable ... again. I think it's the nature of the business and the performers have to be the most optimistic people on earth, in order to stay positive time after time! Hang in there, you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. Things will get better, God willing. :-)

Tim, you hang in there, too. I know a little what you're going through because I have been struggling with depression ever since I hit menopause. It peaks and ebbs, but when it is at its worse, like the others mentioned, things that I can normally handle become unsormountable obstacles and I feel so overwhelmed it doesn't seem possible to get out of the black hole! But with God's help, and my family's, the black hole recedes and I am back out in the light. So, please, never give up because things WILL get better eventually!

Hugs to everyone and welcome to the newbies.

Nertha

Hi Paul,

Last year about this time, I lost my mom(mum), my job and my beloved animal companion in a three month period. I thought I would die. I got my job back, I feel such a presence of my mom from the other side, and a kitten stray showed up in my back yard with the same coloring - orange and white- and looking very much like my beloved Philip. Life can be tough, but I know when enough time passes I can almost always see the reason for the experience in my life.

When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. Thought for the day. You are admired by so many people.

I have never emailed anyone in my life who I didn't know. Never even did a chat room thing.

Take care of yourself through all the afge's. I have faith in your courage and your strength.

Joan

P.S. For the life of me I can't figure out how you feel comfortable spilling your deepest most feeling to so many strangers. I journal myself.

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