Paul's Corner

Paul,
the one observation I would like to make up front is this: you may FEEL alone and lonely in this, but you ARE NOT alone. Just look around yourself, see who is with you.

Granted these may not be the Uncle Bobs you specifically desire to have in your life, but perhaps your image of Uncle Bob needs some adjusting, and perhaps not. Maybe Uncle Bob isn't ready to appear just yet and there may be a good reason for it that you aren't aware of at this point in time.

The anxiety, anger and frustration that I sense in your post I get, but in my experience waiting for the really good thing pays off in the end so much more, then trying to force a mediocre thing to happen because I'm tired of waiting and struggling.

If you can, keep your hope up and visualize the wonderful partnership you seek, instead of focusing on the lack and seeing what others have.
It may just come to you when you least expect it and totally knock you off your feet and throw you off balance etc. It happened to me yesterday, kind of slowly had it coming for the last 12 years, perhaps even longer ... not that I'm saying that I hope it takes that long for you to achieve your goals.
Here's a big hug for you, Paul.

Evelyn

If you believe it, it will happen.

Sally C.

Hi paul,
here is Bärbel(Babs) again.
I know that other things go through your mind at the moment. And I don`t want to seem impolite because I don`t have an encouragement for you. But I just want to know if you or Cat have found the package because you wrote that you will look into it.

P.S. I would like to express myself to something you write but I have to translate it all by myself into the German language and it`s often difficult. (Sometimes I have no trust in my translator).That´s just why I write nothing before I write something wrong. I hope you understand and I really hope , that this letter is translated correctly.
Question: Do you understand German ?

Greetings Babs

Paul--it's funny that you should write this on this day. (It's still the 1st of July here in the States.)

Twenty-five years ago, I lost my father on this day. As I grew up, I was closest to my father and had a tougher relationship with my mother from time to time.

However, when I got into my teens, the relationship with my dad really got side-swiped, and it took over 20 years for me to come to terms with it, even to grieve his passing.

Anyway, I grew up somewhat "alone" despite my family, many extended cousins, and local friends. It sometimes feels that we are completely alone, but your reaching out shows that you know deep inside you're not.

When you think about it, your Uncle Bob didn't come to your rescue when your wrote him, maybe because he knew all along what you had in yourself to make it work. It's like when I asked my mother why she was always so concerned about my sister, but hardly ever about me--she said she always knew I could take care of myself.

I think Evelyn's response said it well. Put it out to the universe--but know that you don't want just anyone to partner you. We can't achieve a lift in dance unless we have the right partnership that gives complete faith in one another. I'm sure you want that for your businesses as well.

A hug and good thoughts that the right person (or people) come your way and you'll achieve the success your efforts deserve.

Hi Everyone, Hi Paul,

I have read your story and I have thought – I have felt like this before.

I have been trying to find answers for myself and I feel I am on my way to finally work things out.
Paul, the story shows that you are not realizing that there are many ‘channels’ from which the help can come, but you can only see that one your life experience showed is possible. If we do this we limit ourselves. There is an infinite ways how your dream can be realised, but you limit yourself to few possibilities, as you believe they are the only ones. This time it’s ‘Uncle Bob’. But there is always another way.:)

Last year I read a book called ‘Cosmic Ordering Service’ which explains how people can have anything they want as long as they truly believe that the delivery will come even though they have no clue how it can possibly happen. When there is a strong believe in the positive outcome our minds are happy and are open to opportunities. We seem to get on with life better and we attract things that seem moving us forward ever closer to what we strive for. If there is an underlying disbelief, the force of that fear-based feeling is so strong that it very often can almost cancel out our dreams. The dream that things can come our way. And because like attracts like, if you feel/fear you won’t get something you probably won’t as your belief is what you attract i.e. ‘not getting things’. This is where we need to watch ourselves, and especially our deep seated fears which we may not notice straight away.

Barbel Mohr - the person who wrote this book is someone who actually tested many times how to have her orders (wishes) delivered and every time she was surprised how it all turned out. She did that to prove her friend that it doesn’t work, and it worked perfectly. Then she wrote down her experiences and experiences of others in a little booklet just for her friends, and because so many people told her she should publish it, she had done so.

I do not have this book with me at the moment, as I lent it to my friend, but I do remember that for our wishes to come true, we need to:
1. believe they will be delivered
2. see them as a guaranteed delivery (so you already feel that feeling of happiness as you would have already had it delivered; OK you don’t have it just yet, but you know you’ll get it just need to wait for it)
3. listen to our hunches or instinct and follow them as they might be helping us on our way to get the delivery (these include sometimes hunches to do things differently)

It was actually described that our wishes are like orders to the Universe so she called it Universal Parcel Force or something like this. The universe receives an order e.g. ‘I wish to have a new nice bike’ and the person that made an order sends it out and trusts that it will come. Those who place orders but do not believe that their order (wish) can possibly be made true, do themselves a big disfavour. That disbelief that the Universe (God, Higher Power, whatever you want to name it) is not capable of delivering us what we wish is so strong that it can actually mess up our delivery. That disbelieve can be a very deep subconscious thought nevertheless it’s still there. It’s can be that little voice we are trying to ignore that says ‘it can’t be true, why am I fooling myself’, what if it won’t happen? etc.

The other thing is that when we order sometimes we limit the Universal Parcel Force as to how it can deliver the ‘parcel’ and we look only in one direction. We see only few possibilities where the delivery man can come from. We do not see certain opportunities and we miss them. We don’t know which route the delivery man can choose, but we think we’ve already worked everything out.

She gave an example of a person who was expecting a parcel to be delivered i.e. normal mail delivery. And because that person lived in a block of flats she usually would use a lift to go up or down. On that particular day she needed to go out and as she walked out of her flat, she had a feeling to use staircase rather than a lift this time. And she did so, and she didn’t question her impulse thinking. On her way she met the postman who had a parcel for her. The postman was working his way up going by stair case instead of using a lift on this occasion. She realized that if she would have ignored her feeling and went by lift she would have missed the postman and the parcel, and she would have been very disappointed. The next options for her would be to wait for the postman to re-deliver or to go and collect the parcel herself. Which would delay the delivery and be more inconvenient.

This is quite a strong analogy and I feel we do very often miss the postman. The Universal Parcel Force wants to deliver us the order item, but we just won’t give it a better chance. We know better, don’t we? I can imagine myself saying to myself ‘Stair case, why staircase, how funny, I have no time for this, I’m going by lift, I always go by lift, so don’t be silly.” – and I would have definitely missed that postman.

Since then I watched the film ‘The Secret’ which expanded on this subject and I started to apply what they call ‘the law of attraction’ and it worked. Not every time, but I am aware that not every time I was deeply convinced things can come my way.

The author also suggested that if we have difficulty in believing in delivering us big things we should start with small. This way we build up our trust that we can get the Cosmic Ordering Service work for us, and we’ll become more and more proficient in it.

I have recently had one of my biggest surprises of all making my order and I was gobsmacked as I would have never guessed it would turned out that way. Delivery came from an unexpected source. I did get my wish come true1 And it was a big one.

I wonder if anybody heard about Cosmic Ordering Service. The author is German but her book was translated into many languages.

Hope this gives some comfort Paul. But yeah in a way if we consider our state of mind is what makes our dreams come true, we are the only ones who can help ourselves, we are also the only ones who can really know ourselves and notice what’s going on in our heads. This is really what’s behind our dreams. When we think we can - we definitely can and we’ll more likely to succeed.

Bye for now,
Beata

PS Yeah, I know it's a long one.

Paul, the title of your post more than got my attention. My friend has an Uncle Bob, and he usually sends her witty jokes and such by emails. Somehow I wasn't expecting a witty post from you, and its nice to see you didn't disappoint.

I do my best to be a positive person, and that part of me says that you will find the business partner(s) you need to for your business to thrive. It may not be tomorrow, next week, next month or even next year - but it will happen.

Beata, the book sounds interesting but right now I have more than enough reading material. I wonder if our teensy library has a copy of it...

I'm actually considering my own business venture, but I have a lot to look into before I decide if it can be done. *I* think its a good idea, as do several people I've spoken to about it, but research is necessary. (As will be a "partner" - eep!)

I love you

Oi paul, I am its Brazilian fan, I would like that you he was very happy and he carried through all its dreams. Kisses Maria Horos

HELLO PC FRIENDS,

PAUL-I'd be happy to be a business partner but I don't think our spouses would be real supportive!! HA, HA, HA!

That being said-I married my "uncle bob" but his name is Michael. I never had a paternal influence in my life. The only two were an physically and emotionally abusive step father and a sexually abusing brother-imagine how I felt about the men in general. But, my husband came along and fixed alot of that for me. My mother's husband (not the abusive one) gave me away at my wedding. While he may not be a "daddy", he believes in me.

Like you, I earned everything that I had and have. I grew up poor but I will never and have never forgotten where I came from. It's the roots that make us appreciate the present and future.

You have the chance to be Uncle Bob to your three lovely young ladies. Whatever Uncle Bob's reason for not acknowledging your thoughts at such a tender age-he should appreciate the man you've become. I get where you're coming from-it's a void that's never quite full enough.

You know, its funny. The more we 'want' the less we are satisfied with what we have. My advice? Give. Be the "uncle Bob" you always wanted to a fatherless boy just starting out his life. I have found, in many instances in my life as a single mother with no family, that when I feel lost, frustrated or dare I say self-pitying, that the answers I seek have been inside me all along. The way I let them out is to help someone else. If I take the focus off of my problems for a moment and focus on helping to solve someone else's problem, all of the sudden, the answers to my own are right in front of me. Another way to look at it: too often we have tunnel vision when we want something -- and we miss countless opportunities to help others, who will in turn help someone and so on and so on....til one day soon, the answer to all of your hopes and dreams is knocking on your door and telling you that he heard great things about you and how about letting him help make some of your dreams come true. Don't think I think you're selfish and self-centered. That's not what I am saying. Just focus on something/someone else for a little while and see what develops. It's worth a shot. I know everything will work out the way you want it to.

Dear Paul,

I have noticed that in life, the things that "break" us take many years to heal. It isn't until you have gone far enough away from the break, that you are able to look at it in a different way and, only then, can you move on. Obviously, you are not there yet. Some day you will be. We never seem to be able to control how long it will take or why we have to go through it. It's for a reason. You just are not there yet. I'm older than you by a few years and just recently am I getting there. I'm not there yet either, but getting there. There's still hope. Don't give up. Just the fact that you share such personal feelings with all of us here, is amazing. I think this is your journey to eventually moving on. You're barfing up all the pain. Eventually, you will be emptied of it and will be open to filling yourself up with new feelings that will continue to help you grow. You may eventually find that your old goals have changed all together, with regard to your future. You may do a complete turn around and become a different person! Stay prepared and ready to accept this change. It's good! This is the purging phase of your life. You'll be o.k. I believe it. We all do.

I've seen what you are going through in my own son. He was left without a father at the age of 7. It's been a long tough road for him but he is getting there. It's life. It's hard. We suffer and are broken, but somehow, in the end, we heal and come through it.

Be strong Paul!

Grandma Millie, are you out there? Hope all is well!

Mary

Paul, I hope after writing this post and hearing what some of us had to say, it brought some insight and hope. Please don't wait too long to come back and tell us how you're doing. We do worry about you and how you are so sullen sometimes. Like I said earlier, it's a way of purging the bad stuff out of you, but then you need to stand up straight and face the world again. And when you do, we will always be waiting to share in your world, the good and the bad.

Mary S. I know your words were directed at Paul, but can I thank you anyway, as they are so right on for me too at the moment? Thanks!
Evelyn

Thank you Evelyn.

We can all certainly use a boost in life at times. I need one today myself. I was misjudged by a one of my own close family members just after being given such a wonderful boost from her. I know, or at least, sincerely hope, it was not intentional, but none the less, it crushed me and made me feel so abandoned. Like Paul always asks, why do these things happen? And like I always say, don't ask why. It's a lesson and we're supposed to learn from it. It's hard.

Mary S, here's a big hug to you. Being misjudged by people. esp. those close to you is always hard and painful, but you will rise above it. I'm sure of it. Had that happen though too, when my Mum was here for a visit, lots of religious judgementalism ... but I'm leaving this behind me. It sparked some intense thoughts in me to determine what my own beliefs are again, but I'm not happy about how she made me feel.

Take care and do something fun to lift your spirit.

Thank you again Evelyn! You're such a great positive force this week! :)

What this has done, other than break my heart, is re-enforce my beliefs in who I am and what I am not. That's always a good thing. I am even stronger in my ethics now and I've always been very strict on my honesty, etc.

So, like we always say here on the corner, is, out of the worst of sadness, hardships, unfair treatment,and pain, comes our true strength.

It just sucks that it has to be this way. Why do we take the good things for granted?

Dear Paul,

I used to wonder what was the point of life, why struggle through all the mundane things, why go to work every day and eventually die? It all seemed a lot of work and turmoil for not much gain, and that only temporary. I wasn't depressed, just wondering why bother? I was raised in a Christian home and hoped that God was real, but I didn't know. However, my mother prayed for me every day since I was born, and when I was 19 I could tell the "Hound of Heaven" was after me.

In college I was listening to "Jesus Christ Superstar", and wincing every time the 39(?) lashes hit. I had not believed that Jesus had been a historical person until then. But I felt sorry for Him and the pain He must have felt. Then I listened to "Godspell" (you can probably tell I went to college in the 70's!) and realized that Jesus was not only a man, but God. So I wrestled with Him for a bit because I wanted to do my own thing, but He wanted me to be more than that would allow. finally I gave into Him, and it hasn't all been roses and light, because following Christ is HARD!! But He is definitely worth every struggle.

It sounds to me as if you are being pursued by the Hound of Heaven. Give Him a try. You won't be disappointed! And you won't be alone any longer. Jesus is much more than Uncle Bob could ever be.